


This Mess is Just a Trace

by sexiudreams (Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson)



Series: XiuChen [8]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: 5 Things, Car Accidents, Established Relationship, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Obsessive-Compulsive, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-30 03:18:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15743133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson/pseuds/sexiudreams
Summary: Jongdae loves Minseok's OCD, he decides, watching him clean and be lost to the movement.It's a shame the world has cruel ways.--quick 5 + 1





	This Mess is Just a Trace

**Author's Note:**

> Extra tag?
> 
> Obsessive-Compulsive Kim Minseok | Xiumin

Jongdae loves this, he muses, as he watches silently from the doorway. Minseok is staring into the fridge, the worry lines between his eyebrows prominent. They don't smooth out as he turns away to get a black bin liner out, a bag for food waste, and the small washing up bowl they use to take the recycling out. He takes his time, picking every single pot up, and Jongdae watches in awe.

Minseok sniffs at the food before he peers at the dates. If it hasn't gone off, he places it on the counter next to the fridge. If it has gone off, he gently peels the covering off, using a dirty fork or spoon to ease the contents into the food waste bag. The container is then either set aside for washing before the recycling - in the case of yoghurts or now thickened smoothies - or placed in the trash bag or the bowl.

It's a delicate process, and Jongdae smiles as he watches it. Minseok spends so much time ensuring every possible thing is done. He puts his love into his cleaning - even if he utterly stresses and ultimately hates it.

Once a week, at least, Minseok ensures their food waste is collected for the government; they collect it once a week along with the trash or the recycling. It's sent to a plant to be formulated into compost which then goes to struggling South Korean farmers for cheap where needed.

Recycling was something Minseok was a stickler for. Woe betide anyone who accidentally put recycling in the trash, or the trash in the recycling and Minseok caught them. Eventually, after they'd found Minseok rootling around in the bins to check it through, they'd all just agreed to leave their containers on the side and let Minseok do the quick minute job of sorting them. 

Jongdae loves this and gently kisses the worry lines away when Minseok is finished. Jongdae loves this as he carries the bags down and helps them be disposed of. Jongdae loves this when Minseok cuddles into him, finally relaxed that everything is clean.

* * *

Jongdae loves this, he muses in the morning. Minseok is stressed, cleaning up after Jongdae and Baekhyun's gaming night. Jongdae shouldn't love this - but he does.

He does because once Minseok is finished, he'll come to Jongdae for attention and for calm, and Jongdae will hold him close. He'll whisper sweet nothings into Minseok's ear and make him feel at ease. He'll make Minseok slowly believe that his obsessive-compulsive disorder isn't a monster. Jongdae even gets up to help, giving Minseok meek apologies as he drinks the last of the lukewarm energy drinks.

Part of Jongdae wants to put them in the trash bag, not the bag for recycling. He wants to see Minseok's tiny soft button nose wrinkle up as he pulls them out. He wants to hear Minseok's little lecture on how the planet is literally dying and they need to protect it. But he knows it'll only upset Minseok more, leaving him victim to the thoughts that haunt him after a small cleaning episode.

So Jongdae chucks them into the correct bag. He loves this, he decides, as Minseok smiles warmly. He decides to help clean more often.

* * *

Jongdae loves this, he's sure. Almost so sure of it now. As Minseok sighs heavily going through everyone's washing bundled at the end of the hallway. He separates a load of whites and disappears into the utility room. Jongdae sneaks in. His arms snake around Minseok's waist.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

_ Be you. Be amazing. Make everything the most adorable thing in the world. _

_Make me fall in love with you every day._

"Do the washing?"

"It's pretty easy."

And Jongdae listens and takes mental notes. He watches Minseok's tiny hands press buttons and pour liquids and pull out drawers - drawers that Jongdae didn't actually know existed. He observes as Minseok shows him how to put bedding in so it doesn't bunch up in the wash. He smiles when Minseok pauses to look up at Jongdae - Minseok's aware that Jongdae asked just to ask, not to learn. He asked to see Minseok smile, happy someone was looking into doing the cleaning.

Minseok leans up and presses a delicate kiss to Jongdae's lips, one he happily reciprocates. They break away, gentle, doe eyes and nervous lip bites like they're teenagers. Then Minseok goes back to explaining the washing machine.

Jongdae loves this.

* * *

Jongdae loves this, it's almost certain. It's almost set in stone. The way Minseok sighs at the mess after dinner. Twelve sets of empty plates, pots and pans, food waste. All over the sides and piled high in the sink. There's something adorable about the way Minseok's shoulders drop and his lips pout.

Jongdae sneaks kisses from that pout, making the corners turn upwards again. Minseok slumps in his arms a little, shaking, and Jongdae kisses his temple. Whispers that  _ it's okay, it's not gonna take long. Get a food waste bag, let's make a start.  _ Minseok always does and he always smiles as Jongdae makes sure every speck ends up in the bag.

Sometimes, he'll throw them gently at Minseok, and Minseok will laugh and squeak – as long as it goes in the bag after their food fights.

Jongdae runs the full and tied waste bag to the bins and comes back to Minseok washing up. Jongdae hugs him from behind, helping Minseok to find more joy in the task. As the draining board fills, Jongdae drags himself away and clears the table. He starts drying up, the two men working in silence.

The moment they're finished, Minseok whisks Jongdae off for kisses and cuddles.

Jongdae loves this.

* * *

Jongdae loves this. He can't deny it anymore. His heart screams it, his mind agrees. His nerves buzz with the knowledge and his lips can't stop smiling.

Watching Minseok help the staff after concerts and meets. Helping clean the stage of confetti and toys. Helping them clean the waiting area of trash. Jongdae's heart sings as Minseok makes sure the unwanted toys are sent to a local children's home, wherever they are, no matter what country.

Jongdae helps. Minseok laughs brightly as balls and teddies get thrown at him. Minseok throws soft toys back and they end up in a war. The rest of the members come out and they end up all in teams. The stage is clean within half an hour and they all leave in high spirits.

Jongdae's arm is around Minseok's shoulders. Minseok's eyes are bright and he's smiling up at Jongdae looking the happiest Jongdae has ever seen him.

Jongdae can't deny it to anyone. He wants to scream it from the rooftops.

He remembers how insecure Minseok had been. Since meeting them. Since debut. Since they started dating. So scared they would judge and hate him for his OCD. So worried that Jongdae might find it too much.

Minseok's face is nothing but pure love, warmth and happiness.

Jongdae is utterly, fully, enraptured with this.

* * *

Jongdae hates Minseok's OCD, he decides. It's a demon. A burden. Nothing good could ever come if it. It's a curse. A hex.

Jongdae's shaking, leaning on a too white hospital wall. Tears stopped pouring down his face a little while ago.

He hates it, he decides, as he remembers Minseok rushing across the road. He had been desperate to pick up a receipt he had dropped, blown by the wind.

Jongdae hates it, as he remembers the screech of wheels. He hates it as he remembers Minseok lying motionlessly, the paper tantalisingly close to his fingertips. He despises it when he remembers Minseok's laboured breathing and lank limbs. 

Jongdae feels hatred for the demon growing inside of him as Minseok's family come back. They're all crying, sobbing, and Jongdae knows what they're going to say. They hate it too, he can see it in their eyes.

Jongdae doesn't remember how to love when Minseok doesn't come home. He barely likes, let alone  _ loves _ .

Their previously shared dorm becomes a mess. The red carpet can't be seen at all. Belongings get thrown everywhere. There's still glass from broken picture frames on the floors  _ because there's no one to vacuum it with a hip wiggle and a giggle _ . Washing up stacks up until they cave in at the mountain, not a single plate nor chopstick clean. Their recycling bin barely becomes full. 

Jongdae doesn't think positive is a thing he can ever feel again. He tries to clean and gets swept up in a ball of hatred and hurt. Things get tossed around the room, worsening the mess. He collapses on the stained, creased and greasy bed sheets to cry. He eats take out food on paper plates.

Jongdae puts the paper plates in the trash. Not the recycling.

The mess gets worse. Jongdae hates Minseok's OCD, he decides. Now he can't even clean without his heart breaking.

 

Jongdae despises everything. 


End file.
